Getting to Grips with English

A sort of moron...

Of all the morons that I've met, and I've met plenty, the most interesting and amusing moron is the oxymoron!

So what is an oxymoron? Some people say that phrases like 'military intelligence' or 'honest politician' are oxymorons (and, I have to admit that these are the ones I really like).

An oxymoron is a figure of speech where one part contradicts or cancels out the other making it, in some ways, an impossible combination. For example, the commonly heard 'pretty ugly' is a great example of an oxymoron if taken literally. Another good one, often found in furniture shops is a 'genuine imitation'. There are lots of them - you can find a good starter list here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_oxymorons where you can see that there are various kinds of oxymora (yes, that's the plural!) ranging from the bland 'detailed summary' to the amusing 'Microsoft Works'.

As I like the ones that Wikipedia have listed as joke oxymora I thought I'd ask you all if you had any good examples - so if you have a good example of a joke oxymoron please send it me and I'll post it up. Don't feel tempted .... please, to send: 'exciting English grammar'

Advise or advice?

A question sent in by  Jose Rodriguez asking about the difference between 'advise' and 'advice':

is "advice" correctly spelled or is it "advise", or both are correct but have different meanings in the United States? which is it? please advise or advice:-)

Thanks

Jose, here comes the advice!

'Advice' is a noun: you can give someone a 'piece of advice'. For example, let me give you some advice about travelling in China.

'Advise' is a verb: He advised me to always keep my passport on me when I was in China. His advice was very useful.

Another example: She was asked to advise (verb) the government on immigration. Her advice (noun) was used to prepare the new programs.

Hope that helps, Jose!

Have you got an enquiring mind... or is it inquiring mind?

In Amercian English there isn't an argument on this one - it's always an inquiring mind but in British English the jury is still out and it seems that either spelling goes.

Why the confusion? Well, ENquire is the Old French and Middle English form and INquire is the Latinized form - it seems both had pretty current usage since written English became established.

Some people feel that there is a difference in meaning and that 'enquire' means to 'ask a question while 'inquire' means to investigate ... If you're in the USA, as I say, this isn't an issue but for the rest of us it seems that you can still choose between those who follow Chaucer (enquyrid) and those who follow Shakespeare (enquire).